Speaker 1 (0s): Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to the TrueLife podcast. I hope that this day is treating you like a champion. I hope that you have looked in the mirror and told yourself how beautiful, how smart, how handsome, how gorgeous, how lucky you are today. Today is what I call three story Friday, because I am going to give you three stories for you to think about.

I believe these stories will be stories that you can carry with you. You can think about them. They will bring about ideas. Perhaps they will poke the bear of possibility, getting you to think about the world in a different way. At least that's the goal. At least that's what I hope they do. That's what they did for me. That being said, the first story is more of a speech. It's a speech that was given by under secretary Donald Rumsfeld.

And it's this idea about leadership. It's an idea about positions, titles, and labels, and what they mean to you may not be what they mean to everybody else. Let me set the stage for you. A former under secretary of defense is giving a speech at a large conference. He takes his place on stage and begins talking, sharing his prepared remarks with the audience.

He pauses to take a sip of coffee from a styrofoam cup that he had brought onstage with him. He takes another sip. He looks down at his styrofoam cup and smiles. You know, he said, interrupting his own speech. I spoke here last year. I presented at this same conference on this same stage. But last year I was still an Under Secretary.

He said I flew here in business class. And when I landed, there was someone waiting for me at the airport to take me and my bags to the hotel Upon arriving at my five star hotel. He continued, there was someone else waiting for me there. They had already checked me in They and my security detail team took me into the elevator. They walked me up to my room. They handed me my key and escorted me to the door.

The next morning, when I awoke, I came downstairs and again, there was someone waiting for me in the lobby with an executive car and they drove me to the same venue that we're in today. I was taken through a back entrance, shown to the greenroom and handed a cup of coffee in a beautiful ceramic cup. But this year as I stand here to speak to you, I am no longer the Under Secretary.

He continued. I flew here coach class. And when I arrived at the airport yesterday, there was no one there to meet me. I called for a taxi. I asked the taxi to take me to a hotel. And when I got to the hotel, I checked myself in. I walked myself up to my room. I carried my own bags. And when I woke up in the morning, I came downstairs, called another taxi and had them take me to the venue here.

Once I arrived here, I walked in through the front door. I found myself to the back green room. Once I got back to the green room, I looked around for someone who Upon making my way to the back greenroom. I found a tech and asked him if there's any cup, if there was any coffee upon making my way to the back, I found where the green room Upon making my way to the back.

I found the green room. I looked around and I saw a young man working. I asked the young man, is there any coffee back here? He looked at me, smiled and pointed to a coffee machine. And next to the coffee machine sat a styrofoam cup of which I poured myself a cup of coffee. At this point, the speaker raises the styrofoam coffee cup shows to the crowd and smiles.

And then he continues. It occurs to me the ceramic cup. They gave me last year. It was never meant for me at all. It was meant for the position that I held. I as an individual deserve a styrofoam cup. This is the most important lesson I can impart to all of you. He offered all the perks, all the benefits and advantages you may get for the rank of your position.

You hold. They're not meant for you as the individual. They are meant for the role for the position that you feel. And when you leave your role, when you leave your position, which you eventually will, they will give the ceramic cup to the person who replaces you Because you only ever deserved a styrofoam cup. What does that make you think of?

What does that make you think about labels? What does that make you think about the position you play in life? This idea that you are better than someone, this idea that you have control over other people. It's a toxic idea. There are positions of authority And these positions are given special benefits, but too many people in positions of authority believe that they are the reason that they have power over people.

And it's this, this concept that he or she, who sits in a position of authority deserves that position. No, it's the position that commands respect and too many people in positions of authority, abuse it, they don't deserve respect. They think people should bow down to them. They think that they're more important. They think that they know more than everyone else and some of them may, but I would argue that the majority of people in positions of authority No longer are the first ones they're in the last ones to leave in today's world.

The people in positions of authority no longer work. The hardest in today. People in positions of authority, No longer Encompass the ideals that the role that the position was meant for, They have mistaken Their personal importance For the importance of the position.

Authority. Leadership are positions of authority that are meant for people who care more about doing The right thing Than doing things, right? Which cup do you deserve? Do you deserve the styrofoam cup or do you deserve the ceramic cup?

Let's move on to our second story of the day. This one's called the subjugation of a ghost. A young wife fell sick and was about to die. I love you so much. She told her husband, I do not want to leave. You do not go from me to any other woman. If you do, I will return as a ghost and cause you endless trouble. Soon, the wife passed away. The husband respected her last wish for the first three months, but then he met another woman and fell in love with her.

They became engaged and got married immediately. After the engagement, a ghost appeared every night to the man blaming him for not keeping his promise. The ghost was clever too. She told him exactly what had transpired between himself and his new sweetheart. Whenever he gave his fiance a present, the ghost would describe it in detail. She would even repeat conversations and it so annoyed. The man that he could no longer sleep.

Someone advised him to take his problem to a Zen master who lived close to the village at length in despair. The poor man went to him for help. Your former wife became a ghost and knows everything. You do Commented the master, Whatever you do or say, whatever you give your beloved, she knows she must be a very wise ghost.

Really? You should admire such a ghost. The next time she appears bargain with her. Tell her that she knows so much. You can hide nothing from her. And that if she will answer you, one question, you promise to break your engagement and remain single forever. The man replied. What is the question? I must ask her. The master replied take a large handful of soybeans and ask her exactly how many beans you hold in your hand.

If she cannot tell you, you will know she is only a figment of your imagination and will trouble you no longer. The next night, when the ghost appeared, the man flattened her, Flattered her and told her that she knew everything. Indeed replied the ghost. And I know you went to see the Zen master today.

And since you know, so much demand to the man, tell me how many beans I hold in this hand. There was no longer any ghost to answer the question. What does that make you think?

Let's move on to our final story. The thief who became a disciple late one evening, a Buddhist monk was reciting some sutras in meditating in through the window, came a sharp sword, a thief demanding that the monk pay with his life or give up all his money. Do not disturb me.

The monk says you can find the money in that drawer on the right hand side. And then he resumed his meditation a little while afterwards, he stopped and yelled do not take all the money. I need some to pay my taxes tomorrow. The intruder gathered up most of the money and started to leave the monk again. Thank a person. When you receive a gift, yelled out, the man thanked him and then made off with the money.

A few days afterwards, the thief was caught and confessed among other offenses that he also confessed to. When the monk was called as a witness to the court, he said, this man is no thief. At least as far as I am concerned, I gave him the money and he thanked me for it. After he had finished his prison term to thief, went to the monk and became his disciple.

This one is called the coconut monkey trap. The trap consists of a hollowed out coconut chained to a steak. The coconut has some sweet rice inside, which can be grabbed through a small hole. The monkey's hand fits through the hole. However, once his fist is clenched, he can no longer fit his hand back out of the hole.

The monkey is suddenly trapped, but not by anything physical. He's trapped by an idea, unable to see that a principle that served him well, When you see rice, hold on tight. So all the monkey has to do to be free is to let go. The monkey is 100% in charge of freeing himself Or remaining there stuck. He doesn't even have to do anything to be free.

It's actually his undoing, his releasing of the fist that frees him. He doesn't earn his freedom. He accepts it by letting go. How many times have you been caught in a trap by your own undoing? How many times have you been caught by not letting go? The choice is yours.

That's what we got for today. Hope you enjoyed it. Let's get up and get at, ah, Loha